On a recent tour of Hasidic life in New York, I came across a story that really stuck with me. It was a perfect example of how people can find common ground in the most unexpected ways. In Williamsburg, there is a strong presence of the traditional Hasidic community, with men in traditional black coats and long beards who settled there after pogroms in Eastern Europe of the early 20th century and as survivors of the Holocaust of the Second World War. In the last few decades, Williamsburg became a trendy place to live, and the so-called "gentrification" started. The new residents, primarily wealthy "hipsters," began to move in and walk side by side with the Hasids. At first, these communities, sharing the same public spaces, seemed like a world apart - with distinctly different lifestyles and attitudes that often lead to clashes and mutual resentment.

But, as it turns out, something as simple as a beard became a bridge between them. The Hasidic men grow their beards as part of their faith and identity, while many of the newcomers wear beards as a modern trend. Over time, people started connecting over this shared feature. They'd talk about "beard pride," exchange grooming tips, and even laugh about how important beards were to both groups, albeit for different reasons. This tiny thing—a beard—became a way for them to appreciate each other's perspectives, leading to a sense of respect and, eventually, understanding. It turned into the "Unite the Beards" movement, highlighting shared human commonalities and supporting their motto, "Hasids and Hipters not as different as you think."

It reminded me of another powerful story shared by Dr. Bill Doherty, who has done incredible work in depolarization. I attended his workshop at the Group Therapy conference, where he shared the story about a former KKK member and a Black man who found friendship and common ground despite the deep divisions that might have kept them apart. They took a leap of faith to sit down and have difficult conversations, openly sharing their experiences, fears, and pasts. It was a painful process but also incredibly healing. Over time, they built a friendship that showed what's possible when we let go of judgments and see each other as humans first.

Both stories show that sometimes it takes just a single, shared aspect—like a beard or a conversation about common human issues—to help us realize that we're not as different as we might think. Focusing on what unites us instead of what divides us creates a path toward understanding, healing, and genuine connection. It's a reminder that, deep down, we all need to belong and feel understood, and even the smallest commonalities can become the spark that brings us together.